Lophen Around

Yoda comes to Tullahoma

2011-10-30T21:21:00.002-04:00

Cold day with the cousins

2011-10-19T13:25:00.002-04:00

Nashville Zoo

2011-10-15T20:42:00.002-04:00

We went to the Nashville zoo today.

The fish were by far Elijah's favorite area. He loves them!

20 months and sporting his new outfit

2011-10-02T09:16:00.002-04:00

Home made Peanut Butter Play Dough

2011-09-21T14:01:00.002-04:00

Today, Elijah and I made some homemade Peanut Butter Play dough (peanut butter, dry milk and molasses).

He enjoyed playing in it as well as the freedom to eat it! :) It makes a great after lunch game because he is already dirty and a little extra protein from the peanut butter is great......plus, the carbs from the molasses helps knock him out for his nap! :)

Another positive, you can store the remaining amount in the fridge for up to a week!

"Don't tell me what to do": Godly Perspective on Stewardship

2011-09-21T13:00:00.000-04:00

“Don't tell me what to do!” We hear this familiar refrain most often from kids who wish to emblazon their own independence and assert their individuality in the face of family or authority figures. To cut straight to the chase, this is a refrain that all people make. However, adults have become more subtle and adept at communicating it. There’s a certain ownership that we feel over our time, our possessions and ultimately, over our entire life. This is why stewardship is such a vital practice in the personal experience of the Christian. It is the practice that gives legs and feet to the basic beliefs of Christian faith that because I am responsible to God in all aspects of my life, public and private, I must be a proper steward of the things in which I have been trusted. As I was thinking about how one could be a better steward of what we have been trusted with, the realization that came was clear as day. The fact is, we are great stewards of our time, money, and relationships when viewed through the lens of our own desires and wishes. If I wish to watch TV for six hours a day, or play video games for the same amount of time, watch YouTube videos until my computer battery dies, or any other pursuit that makes me feel content then I have been a great steward of my time according to me. I can spend my money the way I want to, give my attention to whom I wish, and do the things I want to do. The difficult reality that has to be realized is we are not the final say-so with even our lives. The word “stewardship” itself implies that we have been given a life that, ultimately, is not ours anyway. We are not the originators of anything. There really are proper and improper uses of time, money, relationships, and when not viewed from God’s perspective, those “stewardships” can seem much more like “ownerships” meant for our exclusive use and misuse. A good question to ask in regard to stewardship is “Why do I have this time, money, relationship or position?” Your answer may surprise you. Does you answer immediately lead you to God-given opportunities for His purposes in the world, or toward your own personal greatness? The answer also puts everything into perspective about the things we have but also how they are to be used. Does six hours in front of a screen (of any sort) for blasé, mind-numbing purposes really sound like a good stewardship of our time? If we view time as our own personal possession we may! Intentionality is a key point to remember when practicing stewardship. We must be intentional with our time, finances, relationships and attitudes. If we are not, we resemble a person who may go to an all-you-can-eat buffet. When a person gorges them self until they are ripe to pop, they are not eating with a proper sense of intentionality - its just brainless ingestion of food without a care of what is being put in to their body. If we are not intentional, active stewards, the abundance of time, money, and relationships we have been trusted with will disappear in a buffet of wasted time. God’s attitude for us in stewardship is one of trust, of opportunity. How are we going to best use these gifts for the glory of God instead of the betterment of ourself? Its remarkable how much time is wasted, how much money is wasted, how many conversations are missed by simply filling our lives with things that distract us from what really matters. Resist the idea and the notion that stewardship is a burden to be managed and not a joy and privilege in which you are trusted! What an amazing gift you have been given! What an amazing realization it is to know how we are to prioritize our lives from God’s perspective! May we never be like emblazoned faux-rebellious kids attempting to give off the veneer of being self-actualized and independent with the ownership of our lives that we fail to recognize that our very life is an act of stewardship, not just the particulars.

I Love Me: Narcissism and Personal Surrender

2011-09-12T15:25:00.001-04:00

I like me. There, I said it. I like the way I dress. I like the way I talk. I like the way I think. I like the books I read, the music I listen to, the people I associate with. I like my family, my life, the brands I wear, the shoes I sport and the places I eat. Its difficult to fail in finding a narcissist at every turn. We find them at work, at school, in our family and with our friends. Most of the time, however, we find them staring at us in mirrors. Even those who would say they have the worst self-esteem in the world, have horrible opinions of themselves and debilitating, self-criticizing self-conceptions are, at the end of the day, only aware of this because they are hyper-aware of themselves. We are hopelessly inwardly focused narcissists. This is why I believe Christ has called us to radical surrender. Nothing less could match and overcome our own selfishness. I think this is why God calls us sometimes to surrender the very thing of which we hold most dear. Sometimes, God calls to give the area in which distracts us the most. We can very easily numb ourselves with music, movies, TV or a number of activities that are very enjoyable, but can easily reduce our passion and inculcate ourselves from the world around us which God is calling us to engage and love. John the Baptist addressed this issue pretty clearly when he said in John 3: 30, “He must increase, but I must decrease.” What strikes me hardest about this verse is the lack of ambiguity in this statement. John uses the hard word “must” which leaves me with without an alternative option about what is to happen in my life if Christ is to be glorified in my life. If Christ is to become greater, I must decrease. No longer do I have the luxury of holding onto external things about my life that I like, but to anything at all about myself that fails to glorify Christ. I must become, as it were, a little Christ. When most of us think about the word surrender in relationship to our faith, we often have the tendency to hear it as a drudgery. We are called to give up the music we love or the movies that inthrall us, or fill-in-the-blank. If we are called to give up those things because they are distracting us from God being glorified in our life that’s a good thing. However, what is glorious about surrender is the reality we are also called to give up any and all notions about ourselves that are inconsistent with how God actually thinks of us. Feelings of worthlessness, of self-hate, being bogged down in self-pity, feeling God does not genuinely love and care for us and the resistance of allowing God’s grace to work in our lives are areas of surrender which can be just as harmful to our walk with Christ as any unGodly song or movie. These thoughts, at their root, disconnect us from clear, Christ-like thinking which lead us to knowing and seeing Christ for Who He is. Failing to surrender our own opinions of ourselves for God’s right thinking of who we are keeps us from seeing ourselves as Christ would see us. One of the most basic, foundational beliefs people jettison when being burdened with these type of thoughts, is how the Scriptures communicate our identity. In Genesis 1: 27, the Bible says we are made in the image of God Himself. When we are confronted with the truths of this passage we instantly have to recalibrate ourself in light of John 3: 30, “He must increase, but I must decrease”. Am I going to remain thinking of myself incorrectly? Am I going to continue to hold on to thinking my way about everything about my life is correct, or do I recalibrate my life to thinking like an Image-bearer? How does my feelings of worthlessness, self-hate, self-pity, and not being loved and cared for change in light of the One in Who’s Image I am made? This is not necessarily a call to give ”up” anything, but to give “in”. A call to give in to the wonderful reality that you were made in the Image of One who created the universe; give in to the reality you don’t have to hold on to things, relationships, attitudes, negative self-criticizing opinions or any other outside force that would distract you from being free in Christ. Its a call to give in to the reality that, in some mysterious way, when decreasing, you are actually increasing for the Glory of Christ.SMK

Been There, Got The T-shirt

2011-09-02T18:38:00.008-04:00

Honest confession: I really liked wearing Christian T-shirts when I was a teenager. Not particularly the one’s that were highlighting certain causes that were, for instance, raising awareness for hunger, clean water, or for serious mission endeavors around the globe. I wore the t-shirts that attempted to take a popular slogan or product and change the wording and design ever-so-slightly in order to give the t-shirt a Christian “spin,” thus making me a walking billboard showing everyone that not only was I a Christian, but I had a sense of humor as well.
I was proud walking through the halls of my middle school with a t-shirt that seemingly had the Crest toothpaste logo on it, but had ever-so-slightly been changed to “Christ” with a message about His “whitening power” over sin, or the Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups logo that had again, ever-so-slightly been modified to say “Jesus” scripted in its characteristic yellow cursive. The examples are undeniably abundant.

As I write this, I’m looking back on this time of my life and in the life of my faith with a slight twinge of embarrassment, not for the Jesus in which I believed, but in the way I was displaying His message. Perhaps one of the reasons people, and especially young people decide to emblazon their torsos with such, if we can be perfectly candid here, campy clothing choices is the fact we have been told to “be bold” for Jesus and be a light everywhere we can. This is true. However, boldness is far greater than a t-shirt, and must run deeper than the logo displayed on our poly-cotton blend.

It’s one thing to wear the t-shirt outwardly, quite another to wear the t-shirt inwardly. A Christian kid, or whoever, wearing a Christian t-shirt can be seen by others as categorically no different from a person who identifies himself with a band, sports figure, or a particular retail store. At the core, it has the same message that the marketer relies on: Advertisement without personal investment. No longer do I have to tell you directly about the band, athlete, or style of clothes I love; I can simply wear it and get the most views for the least amount of effort.
Could this really be true? After all, aren’t some t-shirts great at reminding kids of certain times they experienced God in a real ways such as a camp, etc., or about a band they love? Surely there are worse things our young people can be wearing than a shirt that, instead of saying “Guitar Hero” says, “God is my Hero”?
True. The heart of the matter isn’t about clothes. The issue basically comes down to three levels:
1. Does this shirt minimize and/or trivialize, in its attempted wit and cuteness, the God in which the shirt is advertising? Asked differently: Does this t-shirt make a person want to take the God of the Bible with greater seriousness?
2. Is my outward shirt wearing accompanied by and inward wearing of the screen-printed message on the shirt? This is the most crucial aspect of all. Our lives must be lived in consistency with the message in which we wear.
3. Am I wearing this shirt as a way way to avoid getting to know a person intimately and personally as Jesus would, or am I using this shirt to get the message out to as many people with as little personal investment as possible?

As odd as this may seem, Weird Al might have something to contribute here. His career has been built upon taking otherwise serious songs, tweaking them ever-so-slightly, and selling the funny new rendition of the song. We all listen, get a quick laugh them move on. However, Weird Al rarely makes a person reflect deeply on the words of the original artist. If the music industry relied with seriousness upon Weird Al bringing awareness to the original artist the industry itself would be in trouble. If there were a hypothetical people who had no idea of music was and had to rely on Weird Al to point them in the right direction in terms of good music, I doubt seriously people would want to listen (at least to his brand of music).
I am happy to say that 15 years out of that stage that I have let the t-shirts go, but never the Jesus in whom I attempted to display. Hopefully, now I am more concerned with wearing my Jesus on my sleeve than on a t-shirt with sleeves. May we always be on display - t-shirt or not - for Christ - and His “whitening power”.

SK

Poison and Wine - The Civil Wars

2011-09-01T09:08:00.006-04:00

I don’t consider myself a country music fan. So needless to say when I was first exposed to The Civil Wars I was doubtful this would be a group to which I would give much attention. However, despite my preconceived musical proclivities I found myself being drawn to them.
Again, I don’t know exactly what drew me to these artists. Perhaps its the way the lyrics are written which give nuance and subtlety to otherwise complicated issues, or the way the two artists’ voices mesh so effortlessly well, or the fact that this may my first slide down the slippery slope into being a country/folk music enthusiast.
Whatever the reason, I found myself immersed in The Civil War’s video Poison and Wine and found myself reflecting not only on a song about love between individuals but love between myself and Christ.
Much can be said for a well-executed paradox in music and literature. The Civil Wars (intentionally or unintentionally) speak to the heart of a Christian paradox throughout this song, the most recognizable being the refrain, “I don’t love you, but I always will”.
Our faith can sometimes seem to be a paradox at times: On one hand I realize I don’t love God as I should and, at times, even may appear as if I don’t love Him at all. On the other hand, I realize He is wonderful, generous, kind and beautiful and there is nothing that could ever separate, not only myself from His love, but also my love for Him.
As simplistic as this may seem, the song had me at the first lyrical exchange between the two artists: “You only know what I want you to/I know everything you don’t want me to”. I couldn’t help but hear exchange uttered between Christ and myself. God is the only One who can reveal anything about Himself who allows me know only the things He wants me to - be them good and bad - for my betterment. However, at the other end of the paradox, I know everything He doesn’t want me to know. In my short-sighted, rebellious actions we know all-too-well the consequences, the hurt and the pain, caused by our sin. Again, the paradox: God only reveals to us what He would want us to know, but yet due to our sin, we know things God would rather us ultimately not know.
We are in desperate need of healing and desperate need of discipline. God’s mercy gives both; God, in His infinite love offers both from the same hand. I found it comforting when Joy Williams sings, “Your hand can heal, your hands can bruise” reminding me that God’s healing and his bruising and disciplining come from the same hand of love. I would be forever lost if I was simply allowed to make my own way without the gentle, but firm “bruising” hand of the Lord.
Perhaps the clearest paradox in the song is the realization “I don’t have a choice, but I still choose you.” Wherever we as individuals land on the spectrum of the issue of divine sovereignty, one of the things I believe we can fundamentally agree upon is the wonderful reality that somehow, someway God has drawn us to Himself, because of that it is no surprise that we would choose Him. It is wonderful to have a God who draws; wonderful that God opens our eyes to His glory and majesty. It is also wonderful to know that because of His mercy, his faithfulness I would desire to follow Him.
Much can be said for a well-executed paradox in music and literature and in life as well. May we be able to somehow tow the line of the paradox, “I don’t love you, but I always will” with the realization that we are moving closer and closer to “always will”.

Below is the referred video.

SK

First hair cut

2011-08-09T14:55:00.002-04:00

Elijah's hair was getting long in the front....when it was wet, his bangs could almost touch the tip of his nose!! So, I relented and today he got his first hair cut.

Mrs. Janet from church cut his hair and he did SO well.

He was even given a whole dollar for being so good. :)

Morning Play time

2011-08-09T14:51:00.003-04:00

Elijah loves to play and watch cartoons after breakfast.

Right now, his favorite toy is his set of building blocks. :)

18 month photo shoot

2011-06-24T12:37:00.002-04:00

Fathers Day and the Forgotten Fathers

2011-06-18T12:11:00.004-04:00

Elijah and I are very blessed to have Stephen in our lives. He lovingly provides for us, protects us, and gives up pretty much everything for us. He is my best friend, my husband, my provider, my shelter and my earthly example of godliness. To Elijah, he is 'da da', playmate, provider, the guy who leaves every morning for work with Elijah whining while watching him walk away, and the guy who plays with him on the floor before meals and nap times. Yes, we are blessed.

Since this is Father's Day weekend, I have been thinking more on the topic of fathers. I have a wonderful father. My dad loved his family unconditionally, gave everything for us, and never once made us feel like we were a burden to him. Instead, even if my dad was stressed or depressed (which I'm sure he often was!!), he amazingly lived a life that made us feel like we were his favorite blessings.

Since I have such wonderful examples of 'fathers' through my own dad and through Stephen....it saddens me when I peruse how father's are often forgotten or neglected in society. So, this is for the "Forgotten Fathers."

Fatherhood seems so unappreciated in our current world. Media portrays dads are either the 'absent non-involved man' or the 'dumb goof on the couch.' If a father actually wants to step up and be involved in his family life, the tide turns and they then label him as 'obsessive' and 'over-bearing.'

They are often forgotten on their own holiday and expected to 'not care.' For instance, most churches will celebrate Mother's Day extensively, yet barely give a head nod on Father's Day. Don't get me wrong, mothers are very important. I LOVE being a mom and trust me, I also love being appreciate and that being expressed to me. Yet, moms could not be the mothers that they enjoy (or would like to be) if dads were not doing their job. We are mutually dependent. Because of Stephen's willingness to carry the financial burden of our home, I had the honor of being home with Elijah full time and devoting my attention to him. Because of Stephen's willingness to be our protector, I can relax at night and not fear for my safety or for Elijah's welfare. Because Stephen does an amazing job as a Father, I am freed to do my best as a mom.

My wish for Father's Day is that women would be more intentional to thank the various Fathers in their lives and commit to lift them up with their words and actions. If women would not tolerate the ridicule of men in the media and society, perhaps the tide would shift and they would begin to be given the respect they deserve. Life is not simply about being celebrated for being a woman....although I love being one!! Let us also celebrate the men in our life and the ways they are special.

Happy Birthday, Stephen

2011-06-05T13:37:00.002-04:00

Today is Stephen's 30th birthday and the youth group helped to throw him a surprise party. They decorated his office door, as well as the youth room.

Hanging out

2011-06-05T13:35:00.003-04:00

As of recent, Elijah has become an expert climber and hider. One of his favorite spots is an empty drawer in my kitchen. :)

Rich Mullins Film

2011-05-26T22:27:00.003-04:00

As anyone who knows me well knows, I could write a great length on this (and probably will later), but suffice it to say that this is wonderful, long overdue, and needs your support. Go to the site and support this film.

Richmullinsthemovie.com

"Jesus said whatever you do to the least of these my brothers you’ve done it to me. And this is what I’ve come to think. That if I want to identify fully with Jesus Christ, who I claim to be my Savior and Lord, the best way that I can do that is to identify with the poor. This I know will go against the teachings of all the popular evangelical preachers. But they’re just wrong. They’re not bad, they’re just wrong. Christianity is not about building an absolutely secure little niche in the world where you can live with your perfect little wife and your perfect little children in a beautiful little house where you have no gays or minority groups anywhere near you. Christianity is about learning to love like Jesus loved and Jesus loved the poor and Jesus loved the broken."
-RIch Mullins, 1994

SMK

Family Shots

2011-05-01T19:26:00.002-04:00

We attended a Widow's Banquet at church yesterday. They surprised us by taking family photos. So, I decided to share ours!

From Easter Celebration to Easter Medication

2011-04-24T12:53:00.004-04:00

I was awoken this morning by the dreaded sound of a baby gagging.
He did not make good on 'the promise', so I gave him some juice and he played with his Easter basket.

He seemed like he was enjoying his gifts, so I got him dressed for church.
As soon as he was dressed in his precious Easter outfit, the moment hit....he vomited 5 times. Poor baby.

So, off went the outfit. Off went the sweet invitation by dear friends to join them on an egg hunt today.
Instead, he settled in his little recliner with his Easter duck and watched his Praise Baby DVD.

Poor Elijah.

Oh, well. No eggs, no candy...but we are blessed with the superior meaning of Easter today, as well as the opportunity to celebrate it as a family.

Yeah for warm weather

2011-04-10T14:33:00.002-04:00

Kentucky Returns to the Final Four

2011-03-28T15:36:00.003-04:00

Its been since 1998 since KY has been in the Final Four. However, I still remember it like it was yesterday. The 90's were pretty good to the Cats. 3 National Championship appearances in three years, taking home 2 of the 3. Not bad.

But, like all great things, it came to a end - not an end with an abrupt stop, but the worst kind of decline: one that slowly bleeds you into insignificance. Now, Ky was hardly insignificant when it wasn't winning it all, but they undoubtedly were when Billy Gillespie was head coach. Watching KY in those 2 sad years was like watching the Rolling Stones in concert: Sure its still the same guys, but there's definitely something missing, an energy thats gone, a shell of what "was".

Then KY made the change. They built a Wall, found a new Cousin - then, instead of retaining the Wall, went out and got a Knight, took a chubby, out of shape kid in jorts and made him one of the best "big men" in the country and decided it was Miller time.

Despite most people's expectations, KY won the SEC Tournament. In the tournament, KY knocked off its first round, then sufficiently polished off the team who beat them in the 2010 tournament, then beat Ohio St.,(the goliath on par with what KY used to be in past. But, then again, if you beat Goliath what does that make you?), then UK outmatched the only school that could make the claim to be identical in every way to UK...just in a lighter shade of blue.

So, here they are again, here WE are again, in the Final Four with only UConn realistically in our way of cutting down nets for the 8th time. If UConn wins, great for them - they will have played a great game, beat us twice and will deserve their eventual championship. But if KY wins, it will be a return to dominance. Some might say a "rightful place," but I wont go that far. There aren't rightful places, there are only EARNED places.

I'm happy to see KY, my team, earning the right to be where they are again because there's nothing like the Final Four, nothing like having your name as the only one not erased or marked out of a bracket and there's nothing like UK basketball.

"'Til the Battle is Won!"

SK

KY BEATS OHIO ST. TO ADVANCE TO ELITE 8!

2011-03-26T00:23:00.005-04:00

No one thought KY could win this game....including me. I love my team, but Im a realist as well, and I thought it would be nice if Ky would simply not LOSE by more than 10. KY was #4 in our bracket - Ohio St. was #1 in our bracket, #1 overall in the tournament and #1 in the nation by all polls!
Instead of going on ad nosium, let me make it concise and clear:

KY beat Ohio St in defense - anybody who watched that game knows it.
KY beat them in mental toughness
KY beat them in speed
KY beat them in agressiveness
In short, despite what I thought (and to my shame that I'll gladly bear), KY simply beat Ohio St.

Elijah's first trip to the zoo

2011-03-22T21:58:00.004-04:00

Today was Elijah's first trip to the zoo. He and I went to the Nashville zoo and had a wonderful time!

He loved the monkeys. When he saw them, he began pointing his finger and started saying, "Ohhhhh!"

He enjoyed the aquarium exhibit with all the variety of fish, the Meerkat exhibit (one even came up right in front of him and laid down so Elijah could stare at him!) and the iquanas. We happened to show up when the workers were in the cage feeding dead mice to the iquanas and Elijah seemed to be enthralled.

Visit from Mimi and Papaw

2011-03-05T20:57:00.002-05:00

Mimi and Papaw visited Elijah this weekend. As usual, he had a wonderful time!

Stephen and I had the rare occasion to have all three of us in the same picture. :)

Evenings with Elijah

2011-02-24T19:56:00.001-05:00

Elijah is walking!

2011-02-20T07:52:00.003-05:00

Our precious boy began walking this week. He now walks most of the time. :)

Walking!!!!

2011-02-16T13:09:00.002-05:00

My Faith: Suffering my way to a new tomorrow By Rob Bell, Special to CNN

2011-02-14T10:41:00.003-05:00

Thought this was a good article from Rob Bell who is the Founding Pastor at Mars Hill Bible Church in Grand Rapids, Michigan.
He recently wrote this article for CNN and can be found below or at
http://religion.blogs.cnn.com/2011/02/13/my-faith-suffering-my-way-to-a-new-tomorrow/

My Faith: Suffering my way to a new tomorrow
By Rob Bell, Special to CNN

One Friday evening in the fall of my senior year of college I got a headache.

I took some aspirin, laid on the couch, and waited for it to go away. But it didn't; it got worse. By midnight I was in agony, and by 3 a.m. I was wondering if I was going to die.

As the sun rose, my roommate drove me to the hospital where I learned that I had viral meningitis. A neurologist explained to me that the fluid around my brain had become infected and was essentially squeezing my brain against the walls of my skull.

So that's what that was.

The doctor informed me that it would take a number of weeks in bed to recover.

This didn't fit with my plan.

I was in a band at the time. We'd been playing shows in the Chicago area for a while and had just landed our biggest club dates yet in the city - all of them scheduled over the next several weeks.

We had to cancel all of them.

As this reality hit me, laying there in that hospital bed miles from home with a brain infection, I distinctly remember asking no one in particular "Now what?"

I was devastated. This was not how it was supposed to go. The band was my life, my future, my singular focus. We had just canceled our biggest gigs ever. Eventually I recovered enough to return to school but things weren't the same. Whatever had been driving us in the band wasn't there like it had been before and so we came to the mutual conclusion that it had been great while it lasted and now it was time for the band to come to an end.

I don't think I'd ever felt more lost. I had no idea what I was going to do with my life. I had all this energy and passion and I wanted desperately to give myself to something that mattered, but I had no plan.

I would walk around campus in a daze, muttering the same prayer over and over, which took the form of "Now what?"

Do you know that feeling when you're playing soccer and you lunge for the ball but you aren't fast enough and the player on the other team has already kicked it quite hard and the ball travels with ferocious velocity and force into your groin region and you keel over, gasping for breath, your voice several octaves higher?

It was like the existential version of that.

And then, things took a strange, beautiful turn.

In the days and weeks following the band's breakup, people I barely knew would stop me out of the blue and say things like, "Have you thought about being a pastor?" Friends I hadn't talked to in months would contact me and say, "For some reason I think you're going to be a pastor."

Me, a pastor? Seriously?

The idea began to get a hold of me and it wouldn't let go. A calling welled up within me, a direction, something I could give myself to.

I tell you this story about what happened to me 19 years ago because I assume you're like me - really good at making plans and plotting and scheming and devising just how to make your life go how it's "supposed" to go.

We are masters of this. We know exactly how things are supposed to turn out.

And then we suffer. There's a disruption - death, disease, job loss, heartbreak, betrayal or bankruptcy.

The tomorrow we were expecting disappears. And we have no other plan.

Suffering is traumatic and awful and we get angry and we shake our fists at the heavens and we vent and rage and weep. But in the process we discover a new tomorrow, one we never would have imagined otherwise.

I have interacted with countless people over the years who, when asked to identify key moments, turning points, and milestones in their lives, usually talk about terribly difficult, painful things. And they usually say something along the lines of "I never would have imagined that would happen to me."

Imagined is a significant word here. Suffering, it turns out, demands profound imagination. A new future has to be conjured up because the old future isn't there anymore.

Now I realize that what happened to me - the fluid around my brain swelling up and squeezing it against the walls of my skull – is nothing compared to the pain and tragedy many people live with every day.

But that experience irrevocably altered my life. Nothing was ever the same again. My plans fell apart, which opened me up to entirely new future.

This truth, about the latent seeds of creativity being planted in the midst of suffering, takes us deep into the heart of the Christian faith. We are invited to trust that in the moments when we are most inclined to despair, when all appears lost and we can't imagine any way forward - that it is precisely in those moments when something new may be about to be birthed.

Jesus hangs naked and bloody on a cross, alone and abandoned by his students, scorned by the crowd, and yet defiant, confident, insistent that God is present in his agony, bringing about a whole new world, right here in the midst of this one.

This is a mystery, and one we are wise to reflect on it, because of the countless disruptions we experience all the time.

God is in those moments, grieving with us, shedding tears with us, feeling that pain and turmoil with us, and then inviting to trust that something good can come from even this.

So keep your eyes and your heart open. Be quick to listen and slow to make rash judgments about how it's "all going to turn out," because you never know when you'll find yourself miles from home, laying in a hospital bed with a bad case of brain squeeze, all of your plans crashing down around you, wondering how it all went wrong, only to discover that a whole new life is just beginning.

Elijah's First Birthday Party!

2011-01-29T17:29:00.002-05:00

Today was Elijah's first birthday party!

He had lots of people celebrating with him including friends from church, both sets of grandparents, one set of great-grandparents, his first cousins, Aunt Rachel, Uncle Craig and or course, Mom and Dad.

We had his party in the church fellowship hall. He loved the balloons and his personal cake that he was allowed to tear into. I did not know how he would react, but he ate that entire cake!! note to self....monitor his blooming sweet tooth!

He is one blessed little boy.

To my blog critic who hides behind unsigned letters....

2011-01-27T17:35:00.002-05:00

You know who you are. And, most importantly, my God knows who you are. There are a few things you need to know:

1. For whatever reason you have decided to read my personal blog I do not know. You, as anyone else, are always welcome to peer into my life through my blog. You, however, are not allowed to critic me or my family in such an unworthy manner. Should you have questions, I require that you give me the respect of speaking to me in person and not through a shameful typed, unsigned letter that you hide behind and have mailed to my personal home address.

2. The mere fact that you fail to identity yourself in your letter (and you and I both are fully aware that you have written numerous other letters to other people and failed to sign your name there as well) demonstrates to me that somewhere inside you realize the cruelty in which you speak through your words and are therefore ashamed to identify yourself.

3. I respect open and honest communication. That being, when one adult speaks personally to another adult. Please attempt to do so if you decided to speak about me or my family in the future.

4. The post that you so harshly critiqued was not written by me. My husband wrote a letter to his son. Let me say that again...the letter was written by my husband, to my son. You are a secondary audience. Not only did you misunderstand the author and thusly wrongly comment, you made accusations concerning a letter in which you have no part.

4. Tonight, you will be the source of my prayer time. Primarily because the only reason I can comprehend that I would receive such letters from an unnamed author is because she is hurting somewhere, somehow and needs healing. Healing that can probably only be found through repentance and a personal relationship with my Savior, Jesus Christ.

The recipient of your letter, Lorie

Elijah's First Birthday....

2011-01-25T13:40:00.004-05:00

Today is Elijah's 1st Birthday!!!!

We will celebrate his birthday with a party this Saturday. But, today, Stephen and I took him to our favorite Mexican restaurant.

Elijah had a blast! They brought him out a personal Sundae and let him wear a special Mexican hat.

ELIJAH IS ONE!!!

2011-01-25T12:26:00.001-05:00

What an amazing day it is. What an amazing year it has been. I have a son named Elijah that has totally changed my life. He is far and away the best thing I have ever done with my life. He is a far-greater gift than anything I could ask for and far better than anything I could ever think of deserving.
He turned one today.
I remember the day he came like it was yesterday - this year has blown by so fast. Little did I know that just one short year in the not-so-distant future, he would be the kid who’s joy is infectious and laugh is irresistible. He is uncompromisingly loving and trusting. He is precious first, because he is my son, and ever-increasingly so by physical appearance with a touch of his mother around the eyes, and has her laugh (of which I am really happy, because my laugh is ridiculous). Secondly, because of all the unique quirks and personality aspects that are simply, uniquely Elijah:
He always tries to shares his food with mom and dad
His eyes crinkle with he laughs
He loves avocados
He loves to be awake with people and despises going to bed like his dad.
He loves his bath and is quite possible the best part of his day!
He could care less about how much water he splashes out of the tub when he plays in the tub!
He has a ton of friends in the church nursery
He has changed the world in the short year he has been on this planet more than we hope to do so in decades.
He loves to be tossed in the air
He has no fear
He doesn’t know what it means not to trust someone
He doesn’t understand why I wont let him play with my phone
He redeems a terrible day, spinning upside down into a perfect one.
He loves his MeMe and his Papaw, his Nana and Papa, his Uncle Craig and Pete, his Aunt Rachel and his Aunt “B” and his cousins Claire, Nathan and yet to meet child of Craig and Brit.

Today will be the best, not because of the day, because it is dreary and cold, but because it is Elijah’s day. He is one! We will take him to the mexican restaurant and let him put on the sombrero as the staff sing to him, eat a couple bites of ice cream (probably more today that he should!). We will play extra hard in the bath tonight, we’ll put on the PraiseBaby DVD one more extra time and toss him up a few more times.
He is one!
If history tells me anything, its that it’s bound to repeat. If so, then this year’s history is a good one and worth repeating over and over. I can’t wait for next year. He’ll probably be walking and talking and laughing, playing harder and breaking things at breakneck speed. But for right now, I’m happy today is what it is and that Elijah is here and he is one! Happy Birthday, son.

Stephen Keene

2011-01-14T10:11:00.006-05:00

Videos of Elijah

2011-01-14T10:01:00.004-05:00

New Videos of Elijah. He's a funny guy, isn't he?

Snow Day with Elijah

2011-01-12T15:54:00.003-05:00

Elijah and I have been indoors a lot this week due to the snow.

He went outside once to touch it and ended up shoveling a lot of it into his mouth and saying 'ummmm'. He loves ice, so to him, this was a buffet! :)

He can stand in his play pen and watch the snow (and the animals who play in it) from the window.

The Day (Christian) Music Died by Joel Heng Hartse

2011-01-11T13:05:00.005-05:00

I thought this was an interesting article of Relevantmag.com. I agree with much of it, but would like to hear what you all think. If you're a music lover as I am, this will make you think and review your opinions about Christian music. Tell me what you think.

The Day (Christian) Music Died
by Joel Heng Hartse

When I was a teenager, Christian rock was almost my religion. I don’t remember picking up the Bible of my own volition, but an entire wall of my bedroom was plastered with five years’ worth of magazine clippings of my favorite Christian band. And I don’t think it was all that wrong, to be honest. I needed something to revere, and these bands got me thinking about all kinds of ideas that I needed to be thinking about, and stuff that still matters to me to this day—love, mercy, justice, death, life, hope, joy, God—so I’m not really worried this was sacrilege. Yes: I was a Christian rock fundamentalist.

I hadn’t heard of record labels like Kill Rock Stars or Sub Pop, but could rattle off the name of every band on Tooth and Nail or Five Minute Walk. I bought Poor Old Lu (not Nirvana) records, read Seven Ball (not Spin), and listened to a syndicated radio show called Z-Jam (not Z-Rock, which was just down the dial). Rock and roll was part of a package that included church, teen study Bibles, youth group, prayer and evangelism. Yet for all that, I don’t think I was ever a Christian fundamentalist, because I don’t see myself in those stories—sometimes hilarious, sometimes heartbreaking—by the long list of thirtysomething artsy, writery types who grew up fundie and had the spiritual rug pulled out from under them the minute somebody asserted that maybe Adam and Eve weren’t literally the first two real human beings. Everything is thrown into doubt, and cynicism and atheism follow close behind. Though my understanding of Christianity has changed over the years, that is not my story. I did not “lose my religion.”

But I can remember the exact moment I lost my faith in Christian music.

In the 1990s, if I was at a Christian concert, it’s a good guess that Audio Adrenaline were the opening band. I’m not sure why they remained a warm-up act for so many years, but I saw them open for dc Talk and the Newsboys about a hundred times each, tour after tour. ForeFront Records played up Audio Adrenaline’s rock-rebel image; a genius move was releasing a live AA album under the title Live Bootleg, the cover of which displayed a maximum rock-and-roll-style black-and-white photo of a band member headbanging in a totally righteous way. There was nothing bootleg whatsoever about this record—it was a legitimate release on a major label. And Audio Adrenaline didn’t even have a drummer on their first two records, but they were marketed, at the time, like an ultra-rebellious grunge band. If you had to compare them to a regular rock band (and, yes, you had to), you probably would have called them a “Christian Spin Doctors.” Their ubiquitous Christian radio hit, “Big House” (about heaven, not jail), had the same sloppy four-chord party vibe as the Spin Doctors’ “Two Princes,” right down to the goofy scatting.

Audio Adrenaline concerts in those days were heavy on jumping around and shouting, especially on their Christian party anthem (yes, “Christian party anthem”) “We’re a Band,” the chorus of which is: “We’re band! We’re a band! We’re a band!” Audio Adrenaline were, without a doubt, a band. And so their betrayal hurt worse than almost anything I can imagine a Christian band having done.

I don’t mean to place the blame squarely on Audio Adrenaline. This story could be repeated with almost any mainstream Christian rock band in the 1990s, at any concert. But here’s what happened: In the middle of a show, after 45 minutes or so of sweaty headbanging and singing about how They Were a Band, Audio Adrenaline called for a time-out to talk to the audience about Jesus. This wasn’t at all uncommon at Christian concerts—the Christian kids in the crowd happily tolerated it, even though we rarely went up for altar calls. But when one of the band members stepped up to the mic, my life changed. And not in the way the band intended.

“I just want to tell you something,” he said. We got quiet and reverent. “This music that we play—it’s a trick.” He went on to explain that the only reason they played rock music was to get our attention and tell us about accepting Jesus Christ as our personal savior. Jesus loves you, he said, and He wants to have a relationship with you. The music is secondary, not the point; it’s a trap. It doesn’t matter.

It doesn’t matter.

I was stunned. It doesn’t matter. The stuff I care about most doesn’t matter.

I was confused, then angry. How dare you make me care about this music so much, then? How dare you, everyone, Christian record labels and radio and bookstores and bands and youth groups, how dare you make me fall in love with rock and roll and then tell me it’s a farce, tell me that the only reason it’s marginally OK that I’m listening to it is that behind it all is the Right Thing to Believe. I already believe it! Can I just have the music? And you, Audio Adrenaline, you said—you just said, a few minutes ago, in a song, over and over and over, that you were a band. A band!

I had tolerated many lame subcultural trappings for this music I loved, but I would not tolerate a band lying to me. This was the beginning of the end of my teenage love affair with Christian rock—but I’m not bitter. This was a push I needed, a felix culpa that would eventually open up a world in which God could be experienced in a thousand places that were not a church and a thousand songs that were not praise choruses. Once, I didn’t think such a thing was possible.

I suspect many of us have reached that realization, at one point or another. And you might have a similar story. My story continued as I developed ears to hear traces of the holy in everything from Jeff Buckley to Sunny Day Real Estate to Blackalicious to Sigur Ros. And in a way, I guess, I owe it to a band who insisted, for a moment, that they weren’t a band. Even though they totally were.

Again, let me know what you think. Would love to talk about this with you!

Stephen's 2010 Media in Review

2011-01-05T13:45:00.003-05:00

Books read in 2010

Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone - Rowling
Decorating with Books - Heuston
Hitch-22 - Christopher Hitchens
A Letter to a Christian Nation - Sam Harris
God is Not Great - Christopher Hitchens
The Grand Design - Stephen Hawking
Radical - David Platt
Bush at War - Bob Woodward
Through Painted Deserts - Donald Miller
The Roots of Endurance - John Piper
The Reason for God: Belief in an Age of Skepticism - Tim Keller
Searching for God Knows What - Donald Miller
The Gospel for Muslims - Thabiti Aynabwile
Starbucked - Taylor Clark
The Heart of the Problem - Henry Brandt & Kerry Skinner
The Forgotten God: Revising our Tragic Neglect of the Holy Spirit - Francis Chan
The Prodigal God - Tim Keller

Coolest Book of 2010: LORIE’S CONTRIBUTION/WRITING of the workbook to Beth Moore, Pricilla Shrier & Kay Arthur’s study Faithful, Abundant, True!
Favorite Book of 2010 - Prodigal God by Tim Keller
Most Convicting Book - Hitch-22 by Christopher Hitchens
Most enjoyable read - Through Painted Deserts - Donald Miller

Not really a book, but I still, kind-of ashamedly, still subscribe to Relevant. I like the magazine, but I started noticing that its about 80% advertisements now. Its not really a magazine anymore, but just a ad venue for millennial culture. The tag line for the magazine should be:
RELEVANT - GOD. LIFE. PROGRESSIVE CULTURE. ADVERTISEMENTS.
Its just a rather confusing signal, at least to me, that the magazine highlights anti-consumerism and quasi-anti-corporate yada-yada-yada of which you hear coming out of the mouths of hipster young people who don’t really have to provide for themselves or a family, all-the-while subverting itself by riddling the magazine with advertisements which seems to be running um, counter-cultural (?) to the magazine’s readership. And for some strange reason, they keep pushing the musician Sufjan Stevens on its readership. I have a feeling if it weren't just for the people in the Relevant office liking him (thats what it has to be!) he would be filliping burgers. Just a thought.

Movies:
Best New Movie: The Fighter
Biggest Letdown: Tie: The Expendables and Inception
Older movie discovered and loved: The Emperor’s Club

Not too mammoth, I know. This year I received the best gift of all, Elijah Matthew Keene - and thats a far better story that a book and better entertainment than a movie or magazine! I would hope you agree! :)

SMK

Christmas Part Two

2010-12-25T16:58:00.002-05:00

After opening some gifts and his stocking.....Elijah gave Mom and Dad our favorite present....he took a 3 hour nap in Mom's arms while we watched a movie!!

Christmas Part One

2010-12-25T16:53:00.002-05:00

Papa dressed up like Santa and surprised Elijah on Christmas Eve. :) Elijah laughed and enjoyed the outfit.

Nana and Papa gave Elijah his on tiny leather recliner. He loves it! he immediately went to it, sat down with a book, and watched some T.V. :) I think his favorite gifts are the recliner and a set of wooden blocks from his Mimi and Papaw...at least those are the two things he has used so far. :)

We were all suppose to go to my sister's house for Christmas morning, but my niece came down with the flu. So, Elijah's first Christmas was a quiet morning at home with just Mom and Dad.

Playtime with Mom and Nana

2010-12-22T20:36:00.001-05:00

2010-12-21T10:51:00.001-05:00

I decided to take some pictures of Elijah this morning. I've been wanting some new ones of him to print larger than the usual 4x6 and frame. Here are two of my favorites, along with one of him reaching for our tree afterwards. :)

Newsletter Article for Decemeber

2010-12-20T00:55:00.001-05:00

Below is my news article for this month's church newsletter. Enjoy and be encouraged!

Admittedly, watching and reading news is something in which I thoroughly enjoy. If not careful and mindful of my time, the 24-hour news cycle and recycle of sound bites (and bits as its now reduced to) will have in yours truly, a captive audience. This is not a new fascination of mine. During my junior and senior high school career I distinctly recall a keen desire and drive to know what the world was currently experiencing.
Having such a desire has its disadvantages as well. News, after all, never stops (as any journalist or television news anchor will readily volunteer). Its not enough anymore to read the daily or listen to the talking heads on television, but to pay attention to the rolling ticker at the bottom of the screen for the latest of the late breaking news. One might find themselves lost, not just a sea of information from a single source, but in multiple seas from a myriad of sources. Attempting to drink from a fire hose may aptly describe the feelings of someone attempting to stay current in current events.
However, in this season of Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year's we rejoice evermore in the reality that we give thanks and celebrate a news which, while being new and “breaking” when it was delivered to shepherds, Magi, and a young couple in Israel, is not new to us. This news of the Gospel is not new - but it is good! What I love about the word “Gospel” is its root meaning. The gospel is not mere news - a report of an event or occurrence - it is moreover good, wonderful and perfect. We furthermore ought to take peace in knowing what theologians call the “immutability of God”. In other words, how God is unchangeable. No other place in Scripture directs believers to this certainty as Hebrews 13.8 where the writer states, “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today and forever.”
I find it extremely comforting - regardless of whatever the news ticker at the lower half of our television screen may scroll, or whatever world happening might be front and center on our web browser’s homepage - the Gospel is still good news (more accurately, THE good news!) and the God who delivers this good news does not (and will not) change. That is good news, indeed.

Be God’s,
Stephen <><

Bath Time Fun

2010-12-14T13:10:00.003-05:00

A new routine has recently begun around our home: Daddy bathing Elijah. Having been the one who has bathed him from his birth, I must admit, I thought that he might miss me (even just a little) when Stephen took over. That has definitely NOT been the case.

Elijah loves Stephen bathing him. They play, read bath books, kick around in the water, and laugh. Actually, Elijah gets very frustrated if he misses this 'daddy time' or if it is in any way shorter than what he deems 'long enough.'

Window Shopping

2010-12-12T17:24:00.003-05:00

Elijah has had quite an interesting week. For starters, he had a trip to the ER. As I was putting on my shoes the other day, Elijah grabbed the edge of his stocking and pulled it down. Unfortunately, he also pulled with it the hard, metal stocking holder. :( It cut his face in three places. I was so scared. I immediately wiped off his face, called Stephen and tried to do an assessment. I felt like he might need sutures, or dermabound at the least (the surgical glue). So, we went to the ER where their glued two of the three spots. He seems to be healing well, Poor Baby.

Today, I decided to make cookies. Elijah LOVES cookies!!! He stood in front of the oven and watched them bake. :) It was like he was watching his favorite show. He keep going "oohhhh, ohhh."

Scandal of Evangelical Dishonesty by Randy Alcorn

2010-12-02T12:47:00.003-05:00

Ok, this is a lengthy article, however, it is perhaps one of the most honest, articulate and needed articles of late in Christendom. It is by Randy Alocorn and is pasted below. Take some time, really read and think through it and consider to whom our monies are given and to whom our attentions are given when we read books and articles. Its definitely worth the read. If you would like to read the article at its original web-posting direct your web-browser to

http://www.epm.org/resources/2010/Feb/25/scandal-evangelical-dishonesty/

Be God's,
SK

Scandal of Evangelical Dishonesty

By Randy Alcorn
I am painfully aware that the subjects I address in this article are uncomfortable and controversial. Some of my good friends will think it inappropriate to raise these issues publicly.

I want to emphasize that I don’t think most of the deceptions that have become common practice among Christians are perceived as deceptions. Nor do I think they were originally intended as such. Some practices, such as ghostwriting, have developed gradually, with a slow desensitization to standards of truthfulness that authors and publishers never anticipated nor desired.

I do not wish to be or to sound self-righteous, as though I have never been tempted by nor succumbed to some of the common deceptions I refer to, and others as well. I don’t call anyone else to a standard without calling myself to the same. If I am wrong or unfair, I am open to correction, and I invite it.

Honored historians plagiarize. Politicians invent war records. Coaches embellish resumes. Employees call in sick when they’re playing golf. Advertisements promise intimacy with someone beautiful if you buy this car or drink that beer.

We’re so used to being lied to, and so prone to self-deceit, it’s hard to discern what’s true and what’s not.

As followers of Christ, we are to be different. We’re to walk in the truth (3 John 3), love the truth, and believe the truth (2 Thess. 2:10,12). We are to speak the truth, in contrast to “the cunning and craftiness of men in their deceitful scheming” (Eph. 4:14). We’re to speak the truth “in love” (Eph. 4:32).

Truth is far more than a moral guide. Jesus declared, “I am the way, the truth and the life; no man comes to the Father but by Me” (John 14:6). He didn’t say He would show the truth or teach the truth or model the truth. He said He is the truth—Truth personified. He’s the source of all truth, the embodiment of truth, and therefore the reference point for evaluating all truth claims. Jesus came full of grace and truth (John 1:14). He takes the truth personally, because it’s part of who He is.

The phrase “I tell you the truth” appears 79 times in Scripture, 78 times spoken by Jesus. He is the truth, and He tells the truth. We can fully trust everything He says. If we are His representatives, people should be able to trust everything we say.

The Holy Spirit leads men into truth (John 16:13). Christ’s disciples know the truth (John 8:32), do the truth (John 3:21), and abide in the truth (John 8:44). We are commanded to handle the truth accurately (2 Tim. 2:25), and avoid doctrinal untruths (2 Tim. 2:18). The “belt of truth” holds together our spiritual armor (Eph. 6:14).

God “does not lie” (Titus 1:2). He is “the God of truth” (Ps. 31:5). “God is not a man, that he should lie, nor a son of man, that he should change his mind. Does he speak and then not act? Does he promise and not fulfill?” (Num. 23:19).

Unlike God, the devil promises but doesn’t fulfill. He’s always denying, revising, or spinning truth. Jesus said “there is no truth in him” and called him a “liar, and the father of lies.” He said, “When he lies he speaks his native language” (John 8:44).

When we speak the truth, we speak Christ’s language. When we speak lies, when we mislead and give false impressions, we speak Satan’s language.

Consider fundraising strategies where Christian ministries make their mailings look like IRS mailings, or use a handwriting font to make it appear that the director wrote a note he didn’t. Isn’t that misleading?

No matter how we rationalize it, all deception within the evangelical community dishonors Christ, and serves the devil’s agenda. We need to identify deception, repent of it, and embrace the truth of Christ which will set us free to represent Him accurately to a world sick of being lied to (John 8:32).

Truth in the Pulpit?

As it turned out, I flew 3,000 miles to not preach in a prominent East Coast church.

When I was shuttled from hotel to church, a Christian leader rode with me. He’d been accused of dishonesty and financial improprieties. I asked him about these charges.

“Did you really graduate from Harvard, as you say in your messages?” He said he’d taken a class at Harvard once, but no, he hadn’t graduated.

He admitted saying other things that weren’t true, but this didn’t seem to bother him. I told him, calmly, that I thought he should repent and publicly ask forgiveness for his dishonesty.

Five minutes after we arrived at the church, I was escorted to the private office of the senior pastor, where we were to pray before I preached in the service. When I stepped in, the pastor slammed the door and screamed at me. His face turned scarlet, veins showing. He poked his finger at me. I honestly thought he was going to hit me.

Then, out of the corner of my eye I saw the man I’d just confronted. The pastor told me I’d had no right to do this. “No way will I let you preach from my pulpit!” he said.

I tried to explain, but he wouldn’t listen. He was aware of the man’s reputation but thought it none of my business. We went straight into the service. The pastor took the microphone. His voice suddenly sounded sweet and spiritual. He introduced the man I’d confronted, who then conducted the offering, challenging people to give generously because he knew their wonderful pastor. The pastor then told the church he felt “the Holy Spirit’s leading” to dedicate the service to sharing and healing, so regretfully there wouldn’t be time to hear from the guest speaker.

On the long flight home I considered how Christian leaders, who should be guardians of God’s truth, could have such disregard for truth.

This isn’t new. “‘Do not let the prophets deceive you. Don’t listen to their lies. They are prophesying lies to you in my name. I have not sent them,’ declares the LORD” (Jeremiah 29:8-9). Various Christian celebrities, including John Todd, Mike Warnke and Lauren Stratford, were proven to have lied about their experience with Satanism, and sold millions of books and entertained countless evangelical audiences in the process. The world scorns the church for serving as a platform for such lies.

A speaker can be popular, a book can be a bestseller in Christian bookstores, but can still be full of lies.

I do not intend the preceding story to reflect poorly on pastors. Most pastors I know are men of honesty and integrity. I tell the story as an illustration that the Christian community isn’t immune to the dishonesty that plagues the world.

Celebrity Endorsements

A disturbing recent fundraising development is purchasing celebrity endorsements of charities given at conferences and concerts. A speaker or musician gives an appeal for a ministry’s child sponsorships. For every child sponsored as a result of the appeal the performer receives $25 to $50. (In the secular world, this is called a kickback.)

A pastor’s wife attending a popular women’s conference heard a speaker strongly endorse a ministry working with needy children. On a hunch, the pastor’s wife asked the speaker afterward if she or the organization had been paid an endorsement fee. “Of course,” the speaker replied.

Speakers have been paid as much as $10,000 for a single large-event endorsement. A friend of mine learned at a ministry board meeting that the organization was “negotiating” with a popular musician to get his endorsement. “What’s there to negotiate?” he asked. “Either someone believes in this ministry and is willing to give his name to it, or he doesn’t.” If someone is paid money by a ministry for asking an audience to give money to that ministry, it doesn’t qualify as a heartfelt endorsement. It’s more like a payoff.

Satan is a master at twisting good things and perverting acts of grace and kindness into profit-seeking ventures. It’s commendable when speakers or musicians believe in a mission so much they sacrifice to support it. It’s wonderful that they’d take an offering for that ministry. But to be paid for doing so—to take for themselves any amount of money given by those intending it to go to help poor children—is unethical. (If the audience knew, they would be heartsick and perhaps angry. God does know. Is He heartsick? Angry?)

I know a fine group of young musicians who were approached by a major missions organization asking them to promote its ministry. The mission offered them a 20 percent cut of all funds collected at their concerts. Suppose a singer made this public statement: “Eighty percent of tonight’s offering will go to feed the hungry in Haiti; the other 20 percent will go to us as payment for bringing this to your attention.” If the truth was divulged, people would be able to act in light of it. But most ministries, musicians, and speakers wouldn’t agree to such a disclosure. Why? Because it would look bad for everyone. But if it looks bad, isn’t that because it is bad? If those involved would be embarrassed by disclosure, isn’t that an indication it shouldn’t be done in the first place? Ministry leaders should be ashamed of themselves for putting this kind of temptation in front of young Christian musicians who need examples of integrity, not offers to compromise their integrity.

I have no problem with a ministry presenting its vision to a speaker or group and then asking them to pray about calling attention to their cause. I have major problems with offering them a percentage of “the take” (the offering). Unless this is done with full disclosure, unless clear verbal or printed recognition is made of this financial arrangement, the offering is a deception. Anything less than full disclosure to potential donors constitutes fraud. Such arrangements will inevitably promote abuse, and sometimes lead to public scandal. Consider the temptation to overstate or misrepresent needs or to speak with artificial enthusiasm for the poor, while thinking of the larger kickback they will get for doing so. Our enemies dish out enough temptations without us dispensing them to our friends. Think of a Christian speaker appealing to people to give to starving children, knowing what the audience doesn’t—his personal wealth will increase directly in proportion to what he says and how convincingly he says it.

Imagine your pastor asking the congregation to dig deep and give to a mission to plant churches and give medical aid to the needy in rural Colombian villages. Hearts are moved. The church takes an offering of $50,000. Praise God! Now imagine it’s a week later, and a church board member mentions that the pastor was paid $10,000 for making the plea and only $40,000 actually went to the mission. How would you respond? It may sound absurd—but that’s exactly the deal arranged by some Christian ministries with musicians.

Some say, “We don’t publicly disclose this arrangement, because people would get the wrong idea. They’d misunderstand.” The real danger isn’t that people would misunderstand—it’s that they would understand. If they understood that part of the offering was going to the celebrity, not to the cause, they would see it for what it is, and probably not support it. (If I believed in the cause and knew of these arrangements, I would send my check directly to the organization, so more would go to needy children instead of to the celebrity. Shouldn’t I be given the information to allow me to make that choice?)

Taking an offering should be an opportunity to serve the needy, not a means to make money off the cause of the needy. The only way to know one’s motives are right in making the appeal is not to profit from the arrangement. Those in ministry should seek to serve, not to be served. (Isn’t that what ministry is about?) They should look for the right organization to support—which would not be the one that offered them the kickback.

“But speakers are paid an honorarium—what’s the difference?” The difference is that people assume the speaker is being paid. If you attend a seminar, it’s understood that part of the cost goes to the speaker. If you pay for a concert, it’s understood that funds go to the music group. No one’s being lied to or misled. But in the case of paid celebrity endorsements, people are being misled. Poll those attending and you’ll find that most believe the speaker or musician is voluntarily endorsing the ministry because God has touched his heart by it. The audience has no clue that the first several thousand dollars given, or a percentage of the total, goes not to the cause but to the speaker or musician.

The ministry may argue, “It costs money to make money. If we put a full-page ad in a magazine, or if we produce an infomercial, it may cost us a higher percentage of what’s given than if we pay 20 percent to a music group. If people realize it’s okay to spend money to advertise in a magazine, why isn’t it okay to pay to get the endorsement of a speaker or music group?”

The operative word is “realize.” Everyone knows that it costs money to put an ad in a magazine. But unless it’s explicitly disclosed, they have no clue that a speaker or music group is being paid for its endorsement.

“But the poor get more help than if we didn’t do this.” Who says we have to choose between misleading people and helping the poor? Believing that honest fundraising can’t be productive is an insult to God and His people. I believe that speakers or musicians who are endorsing a ministry and receiving nothing in return should make this clear. Doing this would be a great example to other speakers and musicians and would reassure the audience (who might become cynical as they learn of deceptive practices). Best of all, the speaker or musician’s reward would then come not from the ministry but from the Lord. We’re not to serve those who can benefit us, but those who can’t—and then God Himself will reward us in heaven (Luke 14:12-14).

Selling the Spiritual

Opportunism and attempts to buy and sell the spiritual are not new. Simon Magus was the first entrepreneur to see “money” written all over ministry:

When Simon saw that the Spirit was given at the laying on of the apostles’ hands, he offered them money and said, “Give me also this ability so that everyone on whom I lay my hands may receive the Holy Spirit.”

Peter answered: “May your money perish with you, because you thought you could buy the gift of God with money! You have no part or share in this ministry, because your heart is not right before God. Repent of this wickedness and pray to the Lord. Perhaps he will forgive you for having such a thought in your heart.” (Acts 8:18-22)

What makes us think that God has changed His opinion of attempts to profit under the veil of ministry? Every church and ministry leader should ask, “What are we doing that would make us embarrassed or uncomfortable if people knew it?” As I write this, I am asking myself that very question concerning our own nonprofit ministry. If we think of something—and I just did—isn’t that a good indication we should stop it now? (We did.)

Donors should ask the ministries they support whether they are paying to get celebrity endorsements or are spending their funds in some way other than it appears. If the answers aren’t ethically and biblically satisfactory, donors should say that until the ministry’s policies change, they can no longer in good conscience support them and must give their money to ministries that are operating at a higher level of integrity. For everyone’s sake, including their own, ministries need to be held accountable by their supporters—and so do Christian musicians and speakers.

We should be stimulating each other to love and good deeds, setting ethical examples, raising the bar for each other, not lowering it. Jesus will examine the motives of our hearts—including our truthfulness and the sincerity of our words spoken on behalf of the poor and in support of kingdom ministries (1 Corinthians 4:5). If we have given to the needy for their good and God’s glory, He will commend us. If we have taken from them for financial gain, He will not.

Imagine standing before Christ someday and hearing Him say, “I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for—yourself!”

The Ethics of Ghostwriting

Ghostwriting is when someone else writes a book that is credited to a celebrity as if he or she wrote it. The rationale is that because the real writer’s name isn’t well-known and marketable, the book won’t sell well unless it’s released under the celebrity’s name.

This is so commonly practiced that many Christian publishers, authors, and celebrities see no ethical problem with it. Some of these people are sincere in their beliefs—I know because I’ve talked with them. I have great respect for my publishers, and many others too, but all of us, including me, naturally become desensitized. Sometimes those of us who are on the inside of publishing—including authors, agents, and publishers—fail to see what those on the outside immediately recognize as unethical.

I’m not talking about the legitimate process of coauthoring, in which authors invest varying levels of work and expertise into the writing. Nor am I talking about books that, after being written, need substantial editing provided by the publisher. By ghostwriting, I’m talking about when the actual writer’s name is not on the cover, or when a person’s name is on the cover (even as a coauthor with the real writer) who did little or nothing to write the book.

I know of cases where the celebrity didn’t write a word and only skimmed through the book for the first time late in the editing process. Is this honest?

Consider what this practice does to immature believers who are athletes, musicians, or public figures made prominent through tragic or newsworthy events. “Here’s the offer: We will make you a lot of money, and you will get to take credit for doing something you really didn’t do.” We feed their ego, and set them up for deception and pride, which is bound to cause them to fall (Proverbs 16:18). They’re under enough temptation already—why do we feel compelled to add to it by making the false claim that in addition to everything else they’re writers?

If we teach them it’s okay to lie by taking credit for a book they didn’t write, why should we be shocked if we discover they lied when they claim to have graduated from a college they didn’t, or to have fought in a war they didn’t, or to have done a job they didn’t? Isn’t it ironic that Christian publishers would consider it an ethical breach if they discovered an “author” gave them a resume containing false information, when the same publisher has knowingly led the public to believe this person wrote a book he or she really didn’t write? Which is the bigger lie?

Nothing is more uncomfortable than hearing an interview with those who are asked about their experiences writing a book they didn’t write. Their temptation is to pretend and cover up the truth. Sometimes they pretend long enough that they convince themselves they’re writers, becoming better liars all the time.

Publishers sometimes approach prominent pastors and Christian leaders whose greatest temptations are toward pride and pretense and then help them pretend they wrote a book, taking pride in something they didn’t do!

Putting musicians, writers, speakers, and others on pedestals goes way beyond healthy respect for role models. It borders on idolatry. It’s not good for anyone, but certainly it’s not good for the young, the immature, and those already struggling with pride, pretense, money-loving, and other temptations that are fed by “I wrote a book” celebrity status.

Ask the average person what it means when a name is on a book cover, and they’ll tell you it means the person actually wrote it. That’s what book buyers believe. Hence, the book is sold to them under false pretenses. I’ve been told “the ghostwriter knows what he’s agreeing to, and if he doesn’t need to see his name on the book, that’s up to him.” But the question isn’t what the ghostwriter or celebrity believes, it’s what the potential book-buyer believes. Ghostwriters may receive far greater royalties than if they were known as the book’s true author. They may have a vested interest in the falsehood just like everyone else involved.

Some of my editor friends are excellent writers. They are sometimes paid their normal salaries by publishers to do the actual writing—not just editing—of books where 100% of the royalties go to celebrities who did no writing.

Why not tell the truth on the cover, saying who really wrote the book and leaving off the names of any who didn’t write it? The answer is simple: “It wouldn’t sell as well.” If the response is “the book is just as good or better than if the celebrity wrote it,” that may well be true, but people should be allowed to decide that for themselves, shouldn’t they? How dare we mislead and deprive readers of accurate information about who actually wrote the book they are considering buying? This isn’t just patronizing and insulting, it’s downright dishonest. Why do we imagine this is any different than withholding information about the used car we’re trying to sell, for fear that if we told the truth people wouldn’t buy it? Is our goal just to sell books, or to honor Jesus?

The same principle applies to columns and articles—including those in many ministry and Christian college publications—that are not actually written by the Christian leaders listed as authors. Some college presidents never write their own articles in school publications, yet their names are always attached to them. If students at the same college put their name on papers written by someone else, this would be grounds for expulsion. So why is it all right for the president to do it? Similarly, ministry fundraising letters signed by the president or CEO frequently aren’t written by him.

In 1990 a scandal occurred involving Milli Vanilli. The singing group’s name became a synonym for dishonesty and hypocrisy simply because the people doing the singing for their recordings weren’t the ones getting credit for it. (So why is this recognized as wrong, but it’s considered acceptable to take credit for a book, article, or letter someone else wrote?) A class-action suit was filed against Milli Vanilli and their recording company. Purchasers of Girl You Know It’s True were given the opportunity to request a rebate for fraud damages. Are readers of books not written by their stated authors entitled to a rebate for exactly the same reasons?

Someone could argue that the real singers sounded better than Milli Vanilli. So what? The whole thing was a lie, and customers were outraged.

It’s ironic that Christians would stoop to ethics that even most non-Christians, who don’t believe what the Bible says about truth, immediately recognize as wrong.

Isn’t it reasonable for both Christians and non-Christians to be able to buy a Christian book with the confidence that the person identified on the book and publicized as the author actually wrote it?

“But ghostwriting is a well-established practice.” Many things are well-established practices, but that doesn’t make them right. I’ve seen people heartsick, disillusioned, and angry when they discover that various popular Christian books weren’t written by the person whose name is on the cover. We who supposedly esteem the truth so highly should be the last ones to participate in such deceit.

Every argument I hear for ghostwriting is pragmatic. Of course people make money by ghostwriting. People also make money from prostitution, theft, and drug dealing. The real question is not whether ghostwriting is profitable but whether it is moral. I never hear people offer biblical and ethical justifications for it, only practical ones. Why? Perhaps because there simply is no moral justification.

There’s sometimes a fine line between ghostwriting and celebrity books written “with” others. Writing a book about people, with their cooperation, is certainly fine, as long as there’s no pretense or false impression about who did the writing. But when the cover puts the celebrity’s name first, followed by “and” or “with” the true writer, the implication is that the celebrity did most or much of the writing. If, in fact, the celebrity did nothing more than grant interviews, answer questions, pass on a few pages of a journal, or tell a couple of stories, then he or she isn’t the author and shouldn’t be promoted as such.

If this isn’t a book by Celebrity X but about Celebrity X, that’s fine—but shouldn’t this distinction be made clear by listing the real author’s name exclusively on the cover? The celebrity can still be emphasized as the subject of the book, but not as the author. The writer shouldn’t pretend to be a world-class athlete or movie star, and the celebrity shouldn’t pretend to be a writer. Sometimes the “name” person is a celebrity author who can write but didn’t write this book. If the celebrity didn’t write it but just supplied some suggestions or advice, he or she belongs on the acknowledgments page, not the cover. Ask yourself, “Given the amount of work the celebrity actually contributed to writing the book, if the name wasn’t well-known, would it be on the cover?” If the answer is no, then the ethics are clear—the celebrity’s name shouldn’t be on the cover as author.

I believe Christian ghostwriting is a scandal waiting to explode. If we in the Christian community don’t clean up our act soon, we’re going to face widespread loss of credibility. What a tragedy if 60 Minutes were to expose this practice we should never have tolerated. Can’t you see Steve Kroft or Ed Bradley holding up a book and asking well-known Christian authors, “Did you really write this book?” Envision the neatly edited scenes of embarrassment, head-hanging, evasions, rationalizations, and reports that “so-and-so author and publisher wouldn’t return our calls.”

This could be a major setback for Christian publishers and authors at the very time Christian books have made unprecedented inroads into the mainstream culture. We need to confess, repent of, and change our policies—and stop being driven by money-love and ego building.

If we’re not telling the truth about who wrote the book—on the cover, in large print—why should people believe what we say inside the book, in small print?

False Advertising by Christian Colleges

Many Christian colleges routinely print doctrinal statements in their catalogs that are not believed or taught by some or even many of their professors. The academic vice president of a major Christian liberal arts college confided to me, “If Christian parents actually knew what their children are being taught in our classrooms, they would pull them out of college tomorrow.” And, I would add, they’d never give another dime to that college.

If Christian colleges told the truth in their promotional materials, some would read like this: “Thirty-four percent of our faculty believe in the inerrancy of God’s Word. Twenty-one percent of our science teachers believe the biblical account of creation. No one in our psychology department believes in the doctrine of original sin. Two out of our three sociology teachers are proabortion and defenders of homosexual lifestyles. The director of our philosophy department is an agnostic. The head of our Bible department hasn’t attended church for ten years because he doesn’t believe in organized religion.”

Why not be honest and admit this publicly? The answer is simple: So Christian parents will keep paying to send their students there, and so the college’s major Christian donors will keep sending money.

I am a great believer in Christian higher education. But the doctrinal statements published in many Christian colleges, including some at which I’ve spoken, are simply false advertising (also known as lying). Much of the motive for this dishonesty boils down to money.

When students go to secular colleges, they and their parents should be prepared for the fact that most Christian beliefs will be argued against, marginalized and often ridiculed in classrooms. Many students are woefully unprepared to defend their faith, and end up abandoning it during their college years. But at least if they go to secular colleges they have no illusions they’ll be taught Christian beliefs. But many students go to Christian colleges assuming they will be taught biblical truths. They and their parents have the right to be told in advance what is actually taught at so-called Christian colleges. (I implore parents to do their homework and find this out.) If your goal is for your son or daughter to lose their faith, there are much cheaper ways to do this than sending them to “Christian” colleges that neither teach nor believe God’s Word!

Raising the Bar

I take no pleasure in addressing these issues. I hope it will serve Christ’s body by initiating some much-needed self-examination and dialogue.

Which Christian colleges, missions organizations, speakers, musicians, publishers, and authors will come forward and confess past misleading practices and commit themselves to the highest ethical standards before the Audience of One, even if it means forgoing financial gain? Who will, in the name of Christ, raise the bar of honesty, integrity, and truth?

Only when Christian leaders establish new and higher standards will others feel the positive peer pressure and accountability to do the same. Only then will reform be widespread, with direct unspun truth-telling becoming the established norm.

Only then will we gain the trust of both the Christian public and a skeptical secular culture accustomed to deception, but desperately needing the truth."

ThankMas Part Two

2010-11-27T19:18:00.002-05:00

Elijah got to sit and rock in Stephen's first rocking chair that he got on his 1st Christmas as a little boy. :)

ThankMas part one

2010-11-27T19:15:00.002-05:00

We celebrated ThankMas with Mimi and Papaw Keene this weekend. Below are some pictures!

Yummy Mac-n-Cheese

2010-11-17T13:40:00.003-05:00

Elijah loves Mac-n- Cheese.......this is his staple food when we go out to eat, as well as the occasional lunch at home.

He self feeds a lot now. His preferences include: steamed English peas; avocado, mac-n-cheese, sliced cheese.......and his ultimate favorite....a crisp, Golden Ritz cracker.

First War Wound

2010-11-10T21:22:00.003-05:00

This week Elijah has really started to want to pull himself up on everything. Unfortunately, he does not choose our soft, leather couches. Nope, he goes straight for the hard coffee table and end tables in our living room.

He is becoming so much more active. He just started really crawling a couple of weeks ago, now he is already walking to pull up and try to cruise. He loves to be played with on the floor.

Sadly, he got his first 'war wound' today. He tried to pull up on the table and fell before I could get to him. Poor baby!!!

Trying out Elijah's new winter coat and hat

2010-10-16T14:41:00.001-04:00

Elijah and I went outdoors today to let him try out his new coat (thanks, Nana Looney!) and his new hat (thanks, Mimi Keene!)

He loves being outdoors.

He looks so grown up in a couple of these pictures. I can not believe how fast he is growing and changing.

He loves people. I am so thankful that God has given us a little boy who loves to smile, play and be around people.

Halloween 2010

2010-10-09T19:33:00.003-04:00

We decided to let Elijah be a circus monkey for Halloween this year. :) We loved the costume and he seems to wear it without any complaints. :) We are looking forward to hopefully taking him to a local Trunk or Treat and letting him show off his outfit.

Hanging out with Super Man

2010-10-07T19:12:00.003-04:00

Elijah put on his new Super Man p.j.'s today. So, of course, he needed to try out the cape for a while. :)

He loved flying around.

I am so in love with my little super hero.

Fall Days

2010-09-17T14:12:00.002-04:00

Learning to self feed

2010-09-14T13:39:00.003-04:00

Elijah is learning to self-feed and he loves it!!!

His Aunt Rachel gave him some McDonald's fries and a chicken nugget yesterday and the child went crazy. :) So, we are now incorporating more hands on food and though the result is a grande mess....he is happy and it provides good photo opportunities.

As you can see, he loves meal time. :)

Roll Cats and Wild Tide!

2010-09-07T13:45:00.003-04:00

Elijah recently received some Alabama football gear from his cousin, Nathan. Stephen and I jokingly say that he will probably grow up saying things like "Roll Cats" and "Wild Tide" because he will get so mixed up between my love of Alabama football and Stephen's love for Kentucky basketball. :)

Our Family

2010-08-30T11:56:00.002-04:00

This is the first chance we've had to take a family picture......O'well, 7 months is not too bad, I guess. :)

Elijah is growing and changing each day. He is displaying his own unique personality. We love him so much and are so thankful for him.

New Logos 4 Bible Software

2010-08-30T10:48:00.004-04:00

Hello all,

If you're a pastor, youth worker, Christian educator or just want to learn more about your faith and be an informed Bible student and teacher. Check out the new Logos 4 Bible Software at www.logos.com/mac that is just about to be released.

Wherever you are in your walk with Christ - whether you want a simply, easy-to-use Bible software system or a have a Ph.D. in Theology, Logos has a software system tailored just for you. I use Logos weekly in Bible preparation and study. Its worth anyone's time to use!

Simply click on the add on the top right of the page to check it out!

SK

Happy 7 months, Elijah!

2010-08-27T08:49:00.002-04:00

Elijah turned 7 months old this week.

He is starting to babble a lot more.....he can now sit up for a while on his own.....and he is so much more fun in general. He loves to laugh and play.....and be held. :)

Nap Time

2010-08-09T15:48:00.003-04:00

Elijah slept sooooo well in his crib last night!! He stayed in his own crib from 8:30pm-5:00am!!!

Normally, he awakens anytime between midnight and three am, which results in my brining him back to bed with me just to get him to sleep. I must admit, I do love holding and snuggling with him at night. But, I'm not going to say I'm upset that he may be starting to sleep through the night.

He is also doing much better with his day naps. He loves sleeping on his belly. :)

Mimi and Papaw Visit

2010-08-03T11:09:00.003-04:00

Stephen's parents came to visit this week. They kept Elijah all day Saturday while Stephen and I attend a kayaking trip.

This was our first time to leave Elijah with anyone for such a long time, but he definitely seemed no worse for the event. Actually, he probably got more attention than usual and I'm sure he loved every moment of it. :)

He went to his 6 month doctor's appointment yesterday. He now weighs 19 pounds and 15 ounces and is 27 inches long. His doctor said that as soon as he can sit up by himself, we can put him in his 'big boy' car seat and he can face forward. I think this will make traveling much easier on everyone. We are hoping to invest in a DVD player/headrest screen for him around Christmas. That way, he can watch movies while we travel to both sets of grandparents! ((This would be a present for all of us! ha!))

Happy Birthday, Papa!

2010-07-23T13:30:00.003-04:00

This weekend is Papa's birthday. So, we all got together today to celebrate!

We went to eat Mexican food and Papa had to wear a Mexican hat and got to eat free fried ice cream (although Claire helped him eat most of it! :)

Elijah loved hanging out with Claire and Nathan.

6 month photos!

2010-07-20T09:00:00.003-04:00

Elijah turns 6 months old next week!

He is growing so fast. He has started to scoot some this month.

He also sleeps now with his stuffed monkey every night. He loves to snuggle with him!

Play time!

2010-07-19T15:12:00.002-04:00

Elijah has not been feeling well the past few days. The poor guy had a cough with sneezing and was running a fever. His nick name was 'grumpy guss.'

But, thankfully, he emerged from a 13 hour night-time rest back to his usual adorable and mild-mannered self. Goodbye, Grumpy Guss!

I am so thankful that he is feeling better. He is back to enjoying some time in his exer-saucer that Aunt Rachel is letting him borrow.

4th of July!

2010-07-04T22:19:00.003-04:00

Mimi and Papaw came to visit Elijah for the 4th of July weekend.

He has been extra loved on this week.........honestly, I'm not even sure how many times the child has been put down. :) But, he has loved every moment of it.

Elijah got his first swing this weekend. His Papaw rigged it up in our front yard next to the hammock. This is going to radically change our lives because now I can actually lay on the hammock and relax, while having him safely beside me hanging in his swing.

Elijah and I

2010-06-27T09:41:00.000-04:00

Elijah is 5 months old!

2010-06-25T09:03:00.003-04:00

Elijah is 5 months old today!

This has been a busy month for changes. He is now very comfortable lying on his stomach and can move his head all around to look at us or go after toys. He started eating his meals in his highchair a couple of weeks ago. So far, his favorite veggies are carrots and his favorite fruit are bananas.

He know eats three meals a day in his highchair, along with some bottles throughout the day. Nighttime has been the most drastic change. He usually starts getting tired around 7pm. He takes a long, hot bath (doesn't his life sound nice, ha!), then I hold and rock him while he chows down on a big bottle....and he is out by 8pm. The most remarkable part is, he is only waking up once now and usually sleeping until 6am or 7am!

He continues to be my teacher as well. I learn a lot from him. For instance, he reminds me how I should see the world and how we all ought to treat others. He is no snob. If you smile at him, he smiles back. If you reach to hug him, he gladly holds on to you. He is loved by the oldest as well as the youngest.

Happy Birthday, Elijah........we love you and are so thankful God allowed us to be your parents!

Father's Day

2010-06-20T17:35:00.003-04:00

Today is Stephen's first Father's Day as a father.
Elijah gave him a coffee mug with his little hand and foot print on it. :)

Elijah and I are both very blessed to have Stephen in our lives.

Lazy Summer Day

2010-06-10T15:27:00.005-04:00

June is a busy time for our family.
Unfortunately, Stephen is gone away for 2 weeks due to work related activities. So, Elijah and I are spending some time alone, and with family.

Today, my sister brought over Claire and Nathan. Right now, the boys just smile at each other, but I'm sure it will not be too much longer before they will be able to run around and play together.

We miss having daddy at home with us, but at least we have some great company!

In his Jeep

2010-05-31T10:12:00.003-04:00

Elijah tried out his Jeep for the first time this morning!

I put him in a walker in the nursery yesterday at church and he seemed to do OK, so I decided to try it at home.

He can only stand up a little while and play with the toys, but it's a new toy and adventure for him!

Happy 4 Months Birthday, Elijah!

2010-05-26T08:36:00.003-04:00

Elijah is now 4 months old!

He has seen a couple of big milestones this past week. First, he cut his first tooth. There is now a sharp little top of a tooth showing on his bottom gums. He loves sucking on is frozen teethers and Baby Oragel. :)

Secondly, he learned how to roll over from his back to his belly! He does this just about every day now. He especially enjoys rolling in his crib.

We love this little man and thank the Lord for him every day.

Meeting the Great Grandparents

2010-05-17T18:22:00.004-04:00

This weekend, Elijah had the honor of meeting his Great Grandparents Willyards. He stayed two nights at their home and enjoyed lots of hugs and kisses!

Elijah is very blessed to actually have BOTH pairs of his great grandparents alive. Right now, he has 8 grand parents total...what a lucky boy!

Mothers' Day

2010-05-09T15:32:00.004-04:00

Today is Mother's Day. I am so thankful for this little boy who has made me a mom. He slept from 8:30pm-4:30am last night straight. At 4:30am, I changed him and gave him a bottle. He did not want to go back to sleep in his crib, but he fell right back to sleep snuggled with me in bed. So together, we slept until 8am!

He began eating cereal yesterday. I gave him some rice cereal for dinner and more this morning for breakfast. At first he spit it out, but soon he began to enjoy it and actually act a pretty good bit. We can only eat this when he is wearing a bib or an outfit that can get messy, because between him wanting to stick his hands in his mouth along with the cereal and spitting up...he and I both end up wearing half of the cereal. :)

We love this little man so much. Stephen surprised me last night with a beautiful letter, and again this morning with a digital photo frame. I have been wanting one so bad. I have such a hard time deciding which pictures to print and frame....now I can keep them all and have them rotating on this frame! :)

Elijah's Baby Dedication Service

2010-05-05T11:41:00.004-04:00

This past Sunday we had Elijah's Baby Dedication Service at church. Bro. Wayne said a special prayer for him and gave Elijah a beautiful baby's New Testament with his name engraved on the front.

Of all the various things we may pass on to Elijah, it is my prayer that he grows up to be not only a man of God but also a boy of God, a teenager of God and so on. Every night as I rock him to sleep I pray for him before I put him down for the night in his crib. A part of that prayer is that God will protect him physically from all illness, emotionally so that he will be kind and good, and spiritually so that Elijah's heart will always be tender towards God.

1 Kings 17:22 has become a favorite of mine because it says "And the Lord listened to the voice of Elijah." It is my daily prayer that this will become especially true in my son's life.

3 1/2 months..bring on the smiles!

2010-04-28T13:26:00.003-04:00

Elijah is almost 3 1/2 months old.

I am seeing remarkable changes in him. He is starting to smile and laugh so much more. He actually did his first belly laugh out loud the other day. He did it three times and now we can not get him to do it again. I think he knows we want him to do it. :)

I think he knows the difference between being at home and being in public. He does so well in public. He rarely cries and usually just sleeps or looks around whenever we go somewhere. Of course we still keep his pacifier with us at all times. Just the other day, I was on all fours under a table at Applebees looking for his beloved pacy that he had dropped.....the things we do for our kids, ha! Luckily, Stephen found it!

Taking Hercules to Kroger

2010-04-26T11:46:00.002-04:00

Elijah and I went grocery shopping yesterday at Kroger. He is getting much better with his head control and now regularly raises his head up and looks around.
Yesterday, as I had him strapped into his car seat and the entire contraption placed in the buggy...I turned my head for a moment to look at the specials on hamburger meat. When I looked back, Elijah was leaning forward (almost out of his car seat!) and pumping his chubby arms in a perfect muscle man position. I tried to coax him to lean back with a bottle or a pacifier, but nope, he would not have it.
He did not seem in any distress..no tears, no complaining....he simply wanted to stay flexed forward. So, I carted Hercules around in that same stance for at least 5 aisles before he gave up and leaned back.

Nighttime Ninja

2010-04-25T13:49:00.002-04:00

I'm becoming a nighttime ninja. I am learning the art of walking into and out of Elijah's nursery at night with great stealth. The child who can sleep through fire truck alarms next door, somehow can hear me breathing in the next room and awaken with great distress. :)
Perhaps my next job in life will be with Jackie Chan.

Spit Up and Self-Esteem

2010-04-23T20:39:00.003-04:00

I came to a strange conclusion today in my life: I'm thankful for spit-up.

I truly believe that it has increased my self-esteem. You see, everywhere I look people are so overly consumed with appearances. I saw a TV commercial the other day with a 'mom' running around the house after 2 small children, sweeping her floors and all the while looking like she just stepped out of a salon. Her hair, makeup and clothes were pristine. I looked down and noticed that Elijah had recently spit up on the left side of my shirt and I think some ketchup from lunch was hanging out on my shorts.

As a teenager, this comparison would have driven me nuts. I was so easily intimidated and caused to feel insecure. It's easy to blame this on society or others, but really it had a lot to do with misplaced priorities. I was too focused on what I felt other people thought about me.

Becoming a mom has changed me in more ways than I could have ever imagined. And one way is my increased self-esteem. I'm not advocating that we walk around looking frazzled.......however, my focus in life has been so far removed from self and onto the task of loving Elijah, taking care of his daily needs and teaching him by word and example to put his truest confidence in who He is in Christ and nothing else......that it has also matured me to the point where a little spit up here and there is no big deal.

Strange how the Lord can use the little things in life to make us pause and be reminded that He alone is our place of confidence.....even if it's only long enough to wipe off our shoulders or change shirts three times a day. :)

My little super hero

2010-04-23T17:08:00.004-04:00

Elijah's Mimi and Papaw Keene bought him a Batman shirt.

Although it says 18 months, Elijah can already wear it around the house with a diaper!

I think the shirt is rather appropriate since he is a little super hero to me. He makes my life so much happier and can bring more joy to his dad and I than we could have ever imagined.

He is definitely the most precious hero I've ever seen.

Together for the Gospel 2010

2010-04-20T21:55:00.007-04:00

Hello all,

This past week I had the privilege of attending the third biannual Together for the Gospel Conference in Louisville, KY. All I can say is "Wow, what a week!" It was a week of learning, growing, introspection, refining, conviction and worship. Most of all, it was a chance to refresh myself on not only the importance and urgency of bringing the Gospel to those whom I encounter, but to hear it again preached to me. The Gospel not only remakes us, but shapes us as well. The Gospel is something that forces my gaze upon Christ and His finished work, once and for all, upon the cross. This finished work is a work that must finish me - bring me to an end of myself, of living solely for myself and living as an enemy of the Cross. After we are in Christ we may no longer be enemies of the Cross in our relationship with Christ, but our sin most certainly puts us at odds (dare I say enemies) at times and God's Holiness. And for this reason, I need the Gospel evermore as a Christian.

Throughout the course of this weekend, I was privileged to hear some men I really respect deliver timely, rich and substantive messages on the Gospel, its impact, and its fleshing out in the world and in the churches in which we minister. There was something so wonderful in its simplicity as well. No eardrum busting worship band, no over-the-top stage show, there was a "lack" of the frills and thrills of the normal conference - except for the overloading of books given away, the bookstore that makes theological nerds like myself get all giddy, and the free StarBucks coffee, of course! And wow, I am so excited about getting the chance to devour the words that were given to me last week. I appreciated the honesty and clarity the speakers exhibited - esp. Piper, Molher, Mahaney, and Duncan. Needless to say I'm happy I had the opportunity to go and meet some really great people, hear a lot of great preaching, get a treasure trove of book and worship God Almighty! If you have the chance to attend in 2012, I highly recommend the trip to Louisville!

If you want to see and hear some of what went down at Together for the Gospel go to this link:

www.t4g.org/resources

Be God's,
Stephen <><

3 months old

2010-04-18T14:44:00.004-04:00

Elijah will turn 3 months old at 8:16am tomorrow morning!

He has learned a lot of new things this month. He now uses his hands much more. He likes putting them in his mouth, and using them to swat away things he does not want. He is also starting to coo a little. It is so sweet to listen to him attempt to talk.

Elijah is also mastering the art of a perfect pout. He can now put out his lower lip into a perfect pouty face. It looks so pitiful.

He has not yet learned how to roll over or crawl, but I think we will work on some of that this month. To be honest, he has not been put down long even to really start trying yet...he LOVES to be held. :)

First Easter

2010-04-04T15:09:00.003-04:00

Elijah and his cousin Nathan celebrated their first Easter together today. They both sat on the front pew with our family and did great (well, during the meet and great time and the worship service..but Rachel and I had to leave with them both when the sermon started, let's just say they had something they both wanted to add to the message, ha!)

just a swinging!

2010-03-31T18:01:00.002-04:00

We put our hammock up this weekend. For me, it is one of my favorite parts of Spring.

I use to spend hours in the hammock reading books. Right now, life does not allow me to do much reading.....but I've discovered my new favorite hammock past time.....napping with Elijah!

He had just ate so we went outside to enjoy the warm day and introduce him to some new parts of nature. Within minutes he was out. I picked him up and fell asleep also. We slept 2 hours in there!

Stephen found us and took these shots. I'm sure he will have plenty more opportunities this summer!

Elijah's First Easter!

2010-03-29T17:46:00.005-04:00

I decided to take some Easter pictures of Elijah today.

He turned 9 weeks old today!
I draped a white blanket over the side of his crib that fell to the floor, got out his Easter basket and went for it. I had thought about trying to take him to get some professionally done, but I think they turned out Ok. After all, it is easy to take photos when you have an adorable subject!

He has a wooden baby rocker in his room. It took me a couple of times to get a picture of him sitting up in it. He kept wanting to lean to the right and almost fall out!

Stephen and I stopped by SONIC today for their 1/2 price drinks. Elijah was in his jogging stroller and when we got there, a family with 4 little boys came into our seating area. Our quiet moment quickly turned to madness as the 4 young boys ran wildly around the area. I thought to myself...you know, I get tired sometimes when he does not sleep through the night, but at least right now, he is still small enough for me to hold and stay in one spot!

Mimi and Papaw Come to Visit!

2010-03-28T13:18:00.003-04:00

Mimi and Papaw Keene came to visit Elijah this weekend!

He enjoyed seeing them again and especially the extra time he was held and rocked. :) They even went on a walk with Elijah in his stroller through the neighborhood. He loves cruising around in his jogging stroller ...it puts him to sleep!

Stephen and I also enjoyed seeing his parents again.....as well as having 4 extra hands around the house for a while! :) I usually change about 10 diapers a day...but with his Mimi around, I think I was down to only maybe 4! What a blessing.

Tent Time!

2010-03-25T15:41:00.002-04:00

I tried Elijah's new tent today. He seemed to like it.

I propped him up on his boppy so he could recline and he just stared at the toys hanging from the ceiling. He only lasted about 20 minutes in the tent before getting fussy, but I'm hoping he will begin to enjoy it more soon. It will also work great for a place to do his tummy time soon!

2 months old

2010-03-23T08:54:00.003-04:00

Eljiah turned 2 months old yesterday.
I found some new pictures of him on my mom's camera that she took while at the hospital. I was amazed at seeing how much he has grown and changed in just 2 short months!

We are constantly learning new things about this little man. Like for instance, Destin is NOT his friend. I was putting it on him to help his diaper rashes, but eventually realized that it was the culprit! He is sensitive to it and when I switched over to Butt Paste (yes, that is the real product name!) they have pretty much gone away.
Also, since he is such a big eater, he has been sucking down a lot of air with his bottles, thus leading to gas, thus just aggrevating his colic. So, we have changed to Dr. Brown bottles and they make him slow down his eating and he takes in less gas...which leads to a happier little boy!
We have also found "Gripe Water" and it seems to settle his stomach as well. It's an herbal mixture of water that contains ginger and it really helps babies with colic or other stomach issues.

Little did I know how much I would be learning about random baby products. :)

He also travels really well in the car and sleeps most of the time. However, spending the night at other places away from his home seems to upset his system a little and create some long nights for both of us. He enjoyed sleeping in his crib and cradle at Nana's, but as Dorothy always said "there's no place like home." Elijah agrees.

Elijah's first trip to Nana and Papa's House

2010-03-21T21:41:00.002-04:00

Elijah made his first trip to Nana and Papa's house. He did such a good job on the way to Alabama....he slept the entire way and even drank two bottles perfectly while in his car seat!

He had the chance to meet a lot of his family for the first time, including his cousin Maddy Norrell. They are just one month apart and I'm sure will grow up to be good friends (just like her father and I!)

We stayed with Mom and Dad and it was so nice to have some help with Elijah...especially at night. Unfortunately, he is struggling with colic and has some crying spells that are so sad. It was a blessing to wake up at night when he is crying and walk in his room and find someone already holding him, changing his diaper or getting his bottle ready...What a blessing!!

Again, we are so thankful to be closer to both our families so Elijah can see his grandparents more often. He is one loved little boy.

Happy Seven Weeks, Elijah!

2010-03-15T13:29:00.004-04:00

Elijah turns 7 weeks old today!!
This past week he has slept much better. He is typically only getting up once or twice a night.

He is also feeling much better it seems since Mom has learned to delete milk, ice cream and yogurt from her diet. It really is amazing how much different he is once I have stopped eating those items this past week. Poor thing, his little stomach was just a little sensitive to them. But hopefully he will outgrow it so he can enjoy ice cream later! :)

UK gear

2010-03-14T13:41:00.004-04:00

Elijah wore his UK gear to church today in honor of March Madness. His Mimi and Papaw Keene bought him a UK sweatshirt, UK socks and UK booties! The outfit is still a little big on him, but at the rate he is growing, he could outgrow it in a month!

I had a couple of people ask what he is doing wear UK clothing in the state of TN....our answer was, 'he is wearing the colors of a team that wins!" ha!

Happy Six Weeks Old, Elijah!

2010-03-09T10:02:00.003-05:00

Elijah turned 6 weeks old yesterday.

We had a full day of running errands to the bank, WalMart, the park, a Chinese resturant and Stephen's office.
He has done a lot in the past week. For instance, he is learning to smile a lot more. They are now intentional smiles and are so cute.

Also, he has spent the last week sleeping in his own room in his own crib. We are still working on getting down the 'sleep part', but he is spending the night there at least!
His bedtime routine is normally this:

7:30pm: Mom rocks him, feeds him, sings to him (his favorite songs are "Somewhere out there" and "Jesus Loves Me"...I know strange, one song is about a little rat who lost his parents, and the other is about Jesus...but who cares..it works!

8:00pm: Mom puts him in the crib and rubs his head, pats his belly and says "shhhh' about 20 times before he normally falls asleep.

He normally wakes up again somewhere between 11pm-midnight: That is Dad's shift to feed him, change him and put him to bed.

He then wakes up again around 3am, and 6am, both shifts are mom's.

Friends and Belly Time

2010-03-04T19:45:00.002-05:00

Today my friend Jessica came to visit and she brought her daughter, Sydney. Sydney is about 3 months old, Elijah is 5 weeks old..but as you can see from the photos..they are the same size. :)

We had a great time. We went outside with our strollers, looked at a park and played together. We jokingly mentioned that these are pictures that we will show at their wedding in 25 years. (Well, I'm kinda joking....after having a child, I'm far more in favor of arranged marriages than every before!)

Elijah also had a 'first' today. He tried belly time on a quilt. He did so good. I was proud of him. He is holding his head up so well.

Happy 5 weeks, Elijah!

2010-03-01T14:16:00.003-05:00

Elijah turns 5 weeks old today.

He growing more handsome and loving each day.

Today he took a nap again in his big boy crib. After seeing how much he enjoyed Nathan's mobile the other day, I decided to turn his on as see what happened. To my pleasure, Elijah loves his monkey mobile! Between the music and the swirling monkeys/bananas, he would just stare at it and even smile occasionally. :)
I was kissing on him today and said "Don't grow up too fast. I love having you small......but you can start sleeping better at night...just keep everything else the same." I promise you, he understands, because I swear the kid laughed!

Meeting the Cousins!

2010-02-28T10:36:00.004-05:00

This weekend, Elijah had the opportunity to meet both of hiscousins!

We went to my sister's house to celebrate her birthday and there Elijah got to hang out a little with Claire and Nathan. We had a wonderful time. I can not believe how much Nathan and Elijah favor one another!

Mom and Dad got to be there, so they were in heaven with all the grandchildren in one place at one time.

We went out for Mexican food (a family favorite), then had birthday cake at Rachel's. I am so thankful that we are now living closer to both sides of our families so that Elijah can grow up seeing his grandparents and cousins.

Feeding Time

2010-02-23T21:54:00.005-05:00

Stephen snapped these shots of Elijah and I today after one of his feeding times.

This little boy loves to eat and loves to snuggle. :)

He eats and sleeps well during the day...now if only we could get the same routine happening at night! :)

Happy One Month Birthday!

2010-02-22T13:04:00.004-05:00

Today is Elijah's one month birthday!

It is incredible how much he is already starting to change. I can not believe that I already have a bag of clothes in his closet that he can no longer wear. He is down to only having 3 'new born' outfits.......the rest are all 3 months clothes. In this one month, we have learned a lot about his little personality.

Here are a few facts about Elijah:
* He loves to eat, and when he is hungry, he wants it 'now!'
* He loves his Halo sleeper sac.
* He enjoys his bath time, but only when he's given a bath in the warm bathroom and dried off quickly afterwards! :)
* He loves having his hair brushed...even though his hair line right now is a mixture of a mullet and an old man's look. :)
* He is a big fan of pacifiers. I thank God someone invented them!
* He has currently trained mom and dad into allowing him into their bed in the early morning hours before it's time to get up just to snuggle for a while.
* He likes having his bottom pampered with a little 'puff of baby powder' when changing his diapers.

Elijah-3 weeks old!

2010-02-15T19:42:00.004-05:00

My baby boy is 3 weeks old today.

Stephen and I were talking this morning about how strange it is to think back on his birth. In some ways it feels like we were leaving our home just yesterday to go to the hospital ...... yet in many other ways, we feel like we have already been parents for years! I think the sleep deprived part of my body feels like it has been years. :)

Elijah is already growing and changing so much. He loves to eat. Currently, he takes between 3 to 4 ounces of milk at least every 3 hours. At first, I did not think he could take that much..but boy has he proven me wrong, ha!

Starting this week, we are going to begin encouraging him to take daily naps in his 'big boy crib' in his nursery so that he can begin to grow comfortable in his own room. We will see how that goes. :)

Elijah's First Tub Bath

2010-02-13T16:42:00.002-05:00

Today we gave Elijah his first tub bath. I have heard stories of how so many babies love this experience..........not my son. :) Nope, he screamed the entire time. As for now, bath time is not the calm, relaxing time that I hope it becomes for him. He was so exhausted after the ordeal that he passed out for over 2 hours.

Elijah-2 weeks old

2010-02-09T14:28:00.004-05:00

Elijah is 2 weeks old (as of yesterday). It's hard to believe that just 2 weeks ago he was still in my belly. Although I enjoyed pregnancy, I'm enjoying having him here to hold much more!

He is changing so much every day. After this bag of diapers is out, I'll be switching him to size 1. I know it sounds crazy, but I almost cried when I realized he has outgrown his newborn diapers. :)

He is a big eater and loves his meal time! Today, I really think I saw a smile on his face when he finished eating. Some people say at this age they can not smile and it's only 'gas'...I prefer to think he is smiling. :)

He is also loving his bouncy. Stephen bought some more batteries yesterday so we can make it vibrate while he is in it. Tomorrow is his '2 week' doctors appointment. At the last visit, he weighed 7 pounds 7 ounces...I'm thinking he will break the 8 pound marker tomorrow.

Nap and Playtime

2010-02-06T12:17:00.005-05:00

We are having so much fun with Elijah.
He loves to be held and to snuggle....especially around feeding time.

The other day, he and I feel asleep for two hours on the couch after he finished eating. Stephen, apparently, found the camera and decided to document the moment. :)
When he is not asleep, he likes to hang out in his swing. I know he is still so small, but I can already see little changes in him. I'm thankful that he is healthy, strong and growing......yet, I already grow sad at times just realizing how fast all of this time flies by.

People laugh and share stories about how tiring these first few months can be........and they are.........yet, they are also so precious. I have prayed more, cried more, and found those quiet moments at home so much more precious than ever before. Life will have it's way soon enough and demand more of our time and attention. For now, I'm allowed to focus just on him. What a blessing.

Happy One Week birthday, Elijah!

2010-02-01T21:25:00.004-05:00

Today is Elijah's "one week" birthday. This has been both the longest and the shortest week of my life. In some ways I feel like I have not slept in a year. Yet, in other ways, I can not believe this child has already been in my life an entire week.

I am loving being a stay at home mom. Our days typically follow a pattern of .....waking up, feeding, changing a diaper, rocking, feeding, changing a diaper, more rocking...more feedings, more diapers. :) I feel like I blink my eyes and Stephen is already home from work and the day is gone. People tell me it snowed outside. I have not had to time hardly look out a window, much less take a stroll outside. :)

My doctor will not allow me to drive for the next 5 weeks and Elijah's doctor said not to take him out 'in public' until he is 6 weeks old. So, we are basically camping out at the house. We are very fortunate that several wonderful people from our church signed up to bring us meals throughout the next couple of weeks. This has been such a blessing. The food has all been wonderful and I enjoy getting to have a few visitors. :)

People say 'enjoy this time because it flies by fast.' So rather than getting cabin fever, I'm seeking to soak in this time when I have Elijah much to myself. I realize that far too soon he will be walking, then running, then off to school. For now, he is in my arms.....and I am thankful.
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Our first few days at home....

2010-01-30T20:05:00.003-05:00

Elijah came home with us on Wednesday, Jan. 27. My mom was able to stay with us until today (Saturday), so that was a BIG help in getting adjusted. We continue to fall more and more in love with him. It is amazing to see how at such a young age, he definitely has opinions and preferences....and has NO problem letting you know them, ha!

His favorite pacifier is a brand called "Soothie." You might as well forget trying to give him any other kind. :) Although sleep is still sort of an allusive idea, having him home with us far outweighs the previous joy of a 'long night's rest'.
Mom left today, so as of tonight, Stephen and I begin our journey as a family of three all on our own.

I am so blessed to have a husband who not only loves us, but is willing to jump in and help with anything. He was up with me last night for the 11pm screaming moment (Elijah screaming, not us! ha!), followed by the 3am attack...and so on. Elijah calms down very quickly when held by his daddy, so thankfully Stephen is more than willing to share the joy of holding him in the wee morning hours when needed.